George

It's been almost two months, and M continues to make fun of our little tree. It's bad enough that the stupid f---ing squirrels keep messing with it, but -- literally adding insult to injury -- M keeps referring to it as the Retard Tree.


Concerned that the poor thing is going to get a complex, I decided to give it a name that would make it a little more difficult for M to pick on it. I chose "George," after M's paternal grandfather, who passed away a few years ago. I had a theory that M would have trouble mocking while thinking of Grandpa George. Plus, our little tree just seemed like a George.

I know, I know-- you're thinking that I've finally gone off the deep end. But you know what? M hasn't made fun of it since, so I must be pretty smart. :)