Carpool Updates

For a while now, M and I have been carpooling to work with next-door Tim. (Our carpool used to include Seza, too, but her office moved to downtown St. Paul -- we miss you, Seza!) Starting last week, we’ll be joined three days a week by a new commuter, pictured here on the ride home from daycare last Friday.




Without going into all the details, one result of our new companion’s schedule is that two days a week, we take Tim and Seza’s car; on the other three days, we take our car. This has introduced some minor variables into our previously static commuting process. Nothing major -- we just have to remember whose car we’re taking, who’s got the parking pass, what time we leave, etc. Should be no problem, except that remembering things is made complicated by the very nature of reality at 6:55 a.m. in January in Minnesota: it’s dark, it’s cold, and we’re usually running late or under-caffeinated or both.

All of those things were true this morning when we encountered a little bump in our departure. Back story: When I worked from home last Friday, M needed the car key to drive, but I needed the remote access fob attached to my key ring to get online. So I took off the car key and gave it to M, but forgot to ask for it back. M put it in the cubby in the driver’s side armrest so he’d know where it was when it was time for him to give it back.

But then a weekend goes by, a new week begins and this morning, M gets ready to go warm up the car (temps are in the single digits again today).

“Got your keys?” he asks.

I peer into my purse and see the corner of my keychain. “Yep!”

M starts the car with his key and leaves it (locked) to warm up. Five minutes later, we’re all ready to head to work, except -- I don’t need to tell you where my car key was, right?

Thank goodness for AAA (Dad, once again, that membership makes a terrific Christmas gift -- thank you!). They had someone there within 15 minutes. The best part: he arrived with a Boston terrier in the passenger seat of his tow truck. Forget the car; I had to know all about the dog!

Evidently, the terrier (named Frankie Sinatra -- how awesome is that?!?) hated being left alone and routinely tore apart his owner’s home, so the driver starting bringing him along on his service calls. “These days, he’s the calmest terrier I’ve ever met, he loves people and he never barks,” the driver told me. Frankie’s been coming to work with him for several months now and the two of them are having a ball.

A happy puppy story almost makes being locked out worth it.

Voice, Gone ...

… thanks to a viral infection of some kind. Should make today’s conference calls interesting! Anyway, if you’ve been holding back something to yell at me about for fear of interruption, now’s your chance.

“Do the Thing You Can’t Not Do”

There was a time, not that long ago, when I was convinced I wanted out of Communications. (Not the department, but rather the function or field or job description or whatever. Financial services is my industry; Communications is my job.) When I left the Corporate Communications Department (with no job lined up) in 2006, the reason I gave was that I wanted to do something different. My then-boss sent out a lovely e-mail announcement with the subject line, “Laura S. Embarks on New Adventure.”

And God knows I wanted to. I was researching vet tech school and thinking about a job at a gardening center. Various people were encouraging me to write a book. A friend thought she could get me an audition as a cage dancer in a club I liked. I was up for something, anything!, different because I was sick to death of how others’ perceived my job and -- this was the kicker -- got in my face (and my work) about it.

After years of being a professional writer (good writing is necessary but not sufficient for effective communications), I was both insulted and wearied by the near-ubiquitous attitude others had towards the job, which is, in sum: the vast majority of adults think they can write. Because they send e-mails on the job, or have a blog (cough, cough), or got decent grades on papers in college, or because they regularly write letters to friends or family, or maybe because they just like it: people think they can write. And worse, they seem to see nothing odd about telling a professional writer how to do her job.

Think about what that means for someone who has spent decades (I count three of ‘em: I was word-crazy from the get-go -- thanks, Mom and Dad!) honing her craft. I wouldn’t dream of telling a programmer how to code or arguing with a financial analyst about the content of earnings reports. Yet, day after day in my role as a senior communicator, I encountered (and still do, sometimes) folks who acted like they could do my job as well as I could -- or at least, well enough.

These are the people who would call to say, “Why did you change my article?” Why? Because you don’t know the difference between “effect” and “affect.” Because you have no concept of where commas go when there’s a day and date in the middle of a sentence. Because the poor syntax you employed made the sentence factually inaccurate. I got lots of reasons -- you want ‘em all?

Sometimes, I could shut those folks up with a reference to rules they didn’t know: “I made the punctuation changes to comply with Associated Press guidelines, which dictate our usage protocols except when overridden by our internal style guide. This is standard in both corporate communications and journalism; I can direct you to more information if you’d like.” This was usually met with confusion or silence, but almost always made folks back off.

That kind of thing takes a toll. You hear yourself snapping at people who question your (far more informed -- on matters of punctuation, at least) judgment. You find that you feel angry about and unappreciated for your work -- and we Type As generally derive a lot of pride (and perhaps an unhealthy portion of our identities) from the work we do.

So then what? Well, I didn’t quit my job 2006 to get out of Comm; I quit because I couldn’t take the ever-mounting stresses of the department I was in and the impending horrors of a certain merger/conversion (which, as it turns out, wouldn’t happen for another two years). But still, it seemed like an ideal time for a change, to get away from fixing bad grammar and having to defend my efforts.

Except, I couldn’t turn it off, any more than I could when I was employed. I’d drive down Lake Street and wince at the missing hyphens or superfluous quotation marks in stores’ signage. I’d mentally copy-edit restaurant menus -- every one I saw. I’d debate myself about whether to follow AP style in my personal e-mails. I’d mutter corrections under my breath when I heard “that/which” errors.

Two years later, I’m back here, in Communications. Same firm, no less -- although a very different department. And while few things still piss me off more than “How come you changed the headline before you posted?,” I’m a little more philosophical about it than I used to be.

This is partly because I’m surrounded by a team of people who really are grateful for my contributions (and frankly, a lot of them are good writers for being non-writers, you know?). But I’m also a little older and wiser about myself. I know that I can’t stop trying to fix the world’s word messes, even if it’s only in my head, so I may as well do it where I’ll get paid, add value, and have a boss who is thrilled by my ability to nit-pick bad grammar into submission.

Long post! Why now? Two things:

First, I was in a meeting yesterday with Aeric, who started out a coworker and is now a friend (Aeric is not to be confused with coworker-friend Eric aka ETC from The Band). Darcy, also in the meeting, passed out a sample letter that one of our vendors has been using for some time. When I saw “… requests will be handled on a Best Efforts Basis [sic] …” and groaned out loud, Darcy looked at me quizzically, perhaps thinking I was unhappy with something she said.

“She’s just copy-editing; she can’t turn it off,” Aeric volunteered and smiled at me.

Second, this morning, I read an interview on Slate’s new Happiness Project blog that included this exchange:

Q: Is there a happiness mantra or motto that you’ve found very helpful?

A: Actually, it’s something that was shared with me by the soon-to-be former editor of Lifehacker, Gina Trapani. When I was interviewing her for my book, Career Renegade, at one point she said, “You do the thing you can’t not do.”

Expo Doggies!

M worked the semi-annual Midwest Mountaineering Expo over the weekend, which included the usual allotment of adorable huskies for rescue, as well as other dogs brought by their owners to be fitted for boots or skijoring equipment. Thanks to M's iPhone, I got a great look at these puppies even though I was at home.

This is Akira.

Here are some dogs from the Adopt-A-Husky group.

Check out the size of this dog -- his head is taller than these two humans' waists!

Sign of the Times

The former Dain Rauscher Plaza:

One Side of a Conversation …

… that I had yesterday afternoon with a co-worker:

Thanks! Yep, Ann Taylor. I just got it. No, I literally just got it, like five minutes ago.

Because I was walking outside on the way back from lunch and a pigeon pooped on my sweater.

No, I’m dead serious. It was in two places on my sweater and all over my wallet.

But did you see what I was wearing earlier? It was a green-and-white argyle sweater, and the poop landed on the white part right in the middle of my chest. And I’m not sure I knew this before, but pigeon poop is not white. It looked like I dropped a Hershey bar on myself. Even just in the four blocks back to the office people were staring and I really didn’t want people staring at my chest all day, so I had to get this.

Oh, sure, I love an excuse to shop. I’m not denying that.

You’d think, but this isn’t even the first time. When my husband and I went to visit his folks when they were living in Dallas, we went to the aquarium there and in the rainforest exhibit, a parrot or a toucan or something pooped all over my sweater then, too. And that one was cashmere! I was so pissed.

No, you’re fine -- it’s totally funny now. It wasn’t funny when I was walking around wearing pigeon poop, but it’s funny now. See you later!

Do NOT "Suck on This"

Last year, I documented here how much I like my business line within the company. It’s small, it’s entrepreneurial (compared to the other business lines here), and the people are just great. Proof of that: a bunch of them are big fans, as I am, of “The Office.” This is why there’s a Schrutebuck and a photo of a Support the Rabid bracelet posted in our common area.

I’ve also documented here how crappy the systems-conversion-slash-merger was this year. The fallout is, well, it’s still happening, but things calmed down for me around June 1. Before that, it was pretty bad. One of the things that helped was knowing I could come into work on any Friday morning and, say, open my Outlook inbox to see an e-mail from our associate general counsel reading "Fashion show at lunch!" or "It's just noise coming out of an ugly scientist."

On a particularly ugly Friday (it might have been the Friday before our annual conference – the same Friday I actually broke down in tears during a phone call with our CIO, Jeff), Tammy opened my office door, slipped her hand in, and slapped a huge Post-it on the back of my door. It read SUCK ON THIS. I laughed so hard that I almost fell out of my chair. (If you saw the episode, you know Michael’s going-away present to Toby, his nemesis in the office, is a Post-it reading SUCK ON THIS wrapped around a rock. If you missed it, go here.)

That was at least three weeks ago and every time I close my office door, I see the Post-it and laugh. I thought a couple of times about taking it down, but then Tammy will come into my office for something-or-other and see it and laugh, and I’ll decide to leave it up some more. You know, for office morale.

Well.

I just met with a very nice person from Compliance (which, you know, is like Legal and HR – they’re not the department you want to mess with in a corporate environment) whom I'd never met before. The meeting was in my office. John came in, introduced himself, was very cordial and pleasant, and sat down. I got up to close the door and as the door was 90% closed (really, it was like it was in slow motion), I realized that the giant neon Post-it reading "SUCK ON THIS" was still there. I froze.

John saw either the Post-it or the horror on my face (which made him then look at the Post-it) and kind of looked at me.

"Um, do you watch ‘The Office’?" I asked.

"Sometimes, but not often," he replied.

"Oh, see, this is a joke,” I said feebly, “because one of the characters… you know, it's probably not the best thing for me to … anyway, I'll just take this down now."

He didn’t say anything else about it or reference it on his way out, but I sorta gotta wonder whether I’ll get the call from HR.

Work-Day Twins Outing

Whatever Aeric's selling, L1 isn't buying it.


We didn't plan to order this much tequila, but it was two-for-one with a game ticket!

How Awesome is My Bro?!?

An excerpt from a recent e-mail regarding local changes at my youngest brother's company:

Phil -----, Recruiter in -----, will assume the vacant MBO role [blogger's note: no, I have no idea what that is] in ----. Phil has been a true asset to ----- for the past two years. He has handled almost every responsibility pertaining to the operations of the office, and done so to a high standard. Many of you could take lessons from him on running D/L in the low 50’s! [blogger's note: That sounds almost made up, but even if it's not real, Phil's evidently awesome at it!]

Based on his knowledge base and skill sets, I am eager to see Phil excel in this role. He will start on Monday, April 28th.

Yay, Phil!

Spring!

It's been wayyyy too long since I posted here, but work has been getting in the way. (It's been seven weeks since the launch and I'm exhausted, but this migration-specific chaos has to die down soon, right? Right?)

On a much happier note, I think we can finally consider it spring in the Twin Cities. I know -- the calendar says March 21 is spring, but the calendar didn't help a whole lot when we got eight (!!!) inches of snow on April 7.

The bad news is that, although I'm suffering from wannastartgardeningitis, it's much too soon to start working the soil yet. (It's just too damp, so digging or tilling will compact the soil, ruining any drainage properties I improved last year by adding compost or other amendments.)

The good news? The Greengirls (my favorite local gardning blog) say that cool-weather annuals like pansies should do just fine in containers right about now. So I forsee a trip to Bachman's in my future tonight. Which makes everything better. :)

That Last Post...

... was probably the low point for me since the conversion, a week and a half into a very difficult time. Although I'm still really sick, I've been able to attend a few conference calls (from the couch) and help with some writing and editing in the last two days , which has made me feel so much better. It's a terrible feeling knowing that you're stuck on the sidelines while other people, people that you respect and care about, work really hard. Just being able to contribute helped my mood a lot. And when I was able to take care of some writing for my wonderful boss (who has, in my absence, been doing the work of at least two people), here's the e-mail she replied with:

Oh God, I've missed you!!!!
This is awesome!

So things aren't necessarily rosy, but they're considerably better than Wednesday. :)

Three Things

First, the technology-conversion part of the project has been worse than any of us expected. Bad enough that there are threats of lawsuits. Bad enough that, for multi-hour stretches, we had users that couldn't open an account, place a trade, view account info, anything -- stuff that's kind of important in the financial services industry. And I can tell you that when that kind of stress is going on, group dynamics tend to get very very ugly. As in emotionally and verbally abusive (not from my wonderful boss, but if I get screamed at one more time by some jackass MBA from Accenture ... ).

Second, just when everyone needs to be chipping in to help, I get laid low by influenza (and yes, I did get a flu shot, but maybe it's not healthy for people to work 18-hour days or 85-hour weeks). It's Day 4 now since I started running a fever and I'm barely able to get out of bed. M's not much better, although he's gonna try to go back to work tomorrow. I'm going to attempt to work from home tomorrow -- just checking e-mails today wore me out, but I don't feel like I can just sit here, even if that's all I really have energy to do.

Oh, and third: I'm an employee again. I know I'll be excited about that (especially my amazing boss, the great health insurance and having paid time off) someday, but right now that feels really far away. For now, this whole thing is absolutely miserable.

Conversion Is Upon Us!

Here we go!

The merger/technology systems conversion I've been working on is finally here: we start migration activities in a few hours. It's strange to think that I've been part of this project, off and on, for four years -- more than ten percent of my life (I know, that's a very "Michael Clayton" thing to say).

Part of me is excited to see it finally happen, but I'll be honest: that excitement is tempered by how badly some of the technology stuff has turned out. I'll be working all weekend, but the users won't see anything until Monday morning -- and that is going to be interesting, to say the least.

Keep your fingers crossed for me! :)

Update on Work Craziness

We're now 20 days out from the merger, which essentially means that I have no life other than work. No, really -- in addition to working lots of hours, I pretty much don't know whether I'm working a particular night or weekend until a few hours right beforehand.

Fun Example Number 1
For example, this past weekend, I cleared the calendar because I was supposed to edit a massive new user manual. We're expecting the editing to take 20-30 hours, so I wanted to get going on it as soon as possible. That means that I didn't leave the house all weekend and that I checked e-mail about every 60 minutes, waiting for the guide to arrive. At 3:30 p.m. on Sunday, I finally got an e-mail saying that the manual isn't in good enough shape for editing yet, but would I mind taking a look at the content to see whether everything relevant has been captured? Then, once the manual is in better shape, I should be prepared to do actual editing. So that was lovely.

Fun Example Number 2
But even worse is how messed up some key technology things are. For example, one of our "technology partners" (read: a vendor, but it's not okay to say that because in theory, they're more important than "just a vendor") is trying to make us hurry up and get all our users to set up and change their new passwords. Why? Because they're worried about how much strain will be put on their new system if users wait until the launch date to do it then.

The only problem is that the application that actually does the password set-up belongs to the vendor -- and it's broken. I got an e-mail about it this morning: "[Name of vendor rep] has requested a fix, but has no ETA." About ten minutes later, I saw an e-mail from one of our help desks, saying that the vendor is really worried about launch-date strain on their systems and wants us to hurry up in getting all our users set up -- for which we need their broken application.

So let's see: They have no idea when they can set up users because their app is broken -- but still, they want us to hurry up so they can see the number of users who aren't set up decrease. I give up.

And both of these fun scenarios are just from the last 24 hours. Ask me about the last four years of this project and I could make your head spin.

Oddly enough, the fact that this project is horrible doesn't really mean I hate my current gig. On the contrary, my boss is amazing, I'm contributing a lot and they're compensating me nicely. Plus, it looks like some great opportunities are waiting for me on the other side of this. As weird as it sounds, I hate this project but love my job and colleagues.

However, when I'm riding home in the carpool and recognizing exactly how much energy gets sapped out of me on a daily basis, my hatred of the project is clearly winning. There's only so much that liking your colleagues will help when you see crazy mistakes being made left and right.

Looking ahead, it just gets uglier. I'm stationed in the Command Center for the whole thing once we launch on March 3, and we're expected to be working nights and days there for three to eight weeks, which takes things out until the end of April. And these last 20 days until we launch? I just don't get to have a life during that time. I suppose that works out well: I'm alternately exhausted and furious, which doesn't leave much energy for social interactions even if I did have time.

I'll post here when I can (and who knows? maybe I'll be sitting around waiting for a manual and have all kinds of time on my hands), but in general, I'm probably more or less in hibernation for up to two months.

The good news?

• Mom sent me the time-share Wii so that I can blow off steam after work with Guitar Hero. (Thanks, Mom! You have no idea how much that has helped.)
• As I referenced above, I've got some really grateful people looking at all the work I've done and putting together possible future options for me.
• And, when this whole thing is finally over, it may actually be time to start the gardening season. :)

Seriously?

This tasty tidbit from Overheard in the Office nicely captures one of the occupational hazards of working in corporate communications -- namely, that most of the rest of the company seems to have no idea what you're doing.

Employee #1, looking at intranet option of business transactions menu: Hey, look! Heh. These morons spelled 'Internet' wrong on this menu.

Employee #2: No, they didn't.

Employee #1: Yes, they did. See?

Employee #2: No, an intranet is different than the Internet. It's sort of like a private version of the Internet for corporations and organizations.

Employee #1: Oh, seriously? Damn, look at you, making me feel all stupid and shit. I've never heard of that before in my life. I bet you're the only one here who knows that. Look, I'll prove it to you. [Calls boss over.] Look, they spelled 'Internet' wrong on this menu.

Boss: Oh, I know! Isn't it funny? Yeah, those morons at corporate can't spell!

Baby Jake has an Opinion

Y'all remember Baby Jake, right? Evidently, before the merger at work got moved back to March, he had some opinions about how likely we were to hit our December launch date:

Baby Jake Hosts a Twins Outing

This is Baby Jake.
In a roundabout way, Jake got me my current consulting gig. His mom, Laura N. (aka "L1" because we have quite a few Lauras in the office -- I'm L2), is a dear friend I've known from work for years. She works for the business line I'm now contracting for (let's call it "BCS") and hired me back in January to cover for her maternity leave. We shared her office for about two weeks right before Jake was born to get me up to speed on projects for her BCS clients , so I feel like I've known him for a while. :)

Flashforward a couple of months: L1's getting ready to come back to work, and my now-boss (best boss ever!) gives me a call to ask whether I was interested in renewing my contract in a different capacity: BCS communications, training and support stuff related to our upcoming merger with another division of our parent company. I was reluctant at first (I really am trying to move away from doing Corp Comm stuff), but I wanted another gig and loved the BCS folks that I got to know while covering for L1. Ultimately, I decided that sometimes what you do at work is sometimes less important that who you're working with, so I accepted and have been really happy that I did. (Granted, it's been a bit of a bumpy ride, but that's what happens pre-merger, right?)

Flashforward a few more months: L1 was the recipient of the veryveryvery good BCS Twins tickets (second row behind the dugout!) for a Labor Day weekend game and invited M and I to join her, her husband and Baby Jake. It was Jake's first time to the Dome and he did great.

In contrast to the Twins' recent lackluster performances, it was a great game. Honestly, though, from these seats, a monster truck rally would probably be interesting. :) Here's Mr. Silva, who did not disgrace himself on the mound that day.
Ladies and gentlemen: my boyfriend!

DJ Cuddles steps up to the plate. I'm wishing I had a photo of the diving catch (he truly went ass over teakettle and came up with the ball) from later in the game -- it was great!

Final score: 6-4 Twins!

Sweetcheeks shares a laugh with manager Gardy. (Can you tell how awesome these seats were? Hint: There's no zoom on that photo.)

Immediately following the game, the grounds crew started the tear-down in advance of a Gopher (that's the U of M, for all y'all non-MNers) football game that night. It was kind of strange to watch them rip up the mound dirt, given that it's piled on top of astroturf.

Thanks a bunch, Jake and L1! :)

RSSIMHRN, July 21-23

I suppose it's not really a "random" song stuck in my head if it's not random, i.e., if I specifically sought out the source of the song -- which, in this case, I did. I saw "Hairspray" (the film) on Saturday afternoon, and for the last three days, my toes have been tapping to what's left in my head of "Good Morning, Baltimore."

"Hairspray" puts you in a good mood that lasts all day. And if you're expecting blah "Broadway-style" tunes, guess again -- the music is fantastic in a very Ronettes-meets-Martha-and-the-Vandellas sort of way. Everyone in the theater was dancing in their seats.

I realize this film's not for everyone, but between the terrific tunes, amazing cast (I was bawling by the end of Queen Latifah's "I Know Where I've Been") and the surprisingly substantial story (it pays homage to the optimism of the early 60s, which promised to be a decade that finally welcomed outsiders, and to those willing to take chances to affect change), I think most folks will find something in there to enjoy. :)

Separately, I've been meaning to finish posting about my goofy squirrel adventures, but last week was pretty icky (the merger for which I'm working on communications/training/support got pushed back a couple of months), so I appreciate your patience. :)

Yay for Wind!

As I think most of y'all know, this is M's third week is his new job, which seems to be nearly a perfect fit for him. The firm is a wind-energy finance start-up, and his role is half project development and half legal affairs. His colleagues seem terrific and he's thrilled to be in downtown Minneapolis (it really is soooo convenient and fun to work downtown). The "settling-in" process is making him a little tired, as I think happens to anyone in a new job when you suddenly have to become an expert on a range of new topics.

One of the coolest things about this, though, is that he has a head start on getting to know the wind energy industry: he did his senior thesis in college on wind power and was a project manager for a small wind power company back in the mid-90s. While he was interviewing for this position, we both kept finding ourselves amazed that, fifteen years and a law degree later, his path has led back to wind power. How awesome that there's now so much more activity and momentum in the industry!

And, of course, it's much more high-profile than it used to be. You'd have to have lived in a cave for the last few years to miss all the attention that alternative energy is getting. A terrific example is this commercial, found and sent to me by my good friend, ETC (thanks for the link!).

A Good Day

Damn, work was good today. Energizing. Anybody else have a boss who:

• Listens completely to your concerns,
• Uses your feedback to make principled, "risky" decisions that eliminate the obstacles you've encountered,
• And then empowers you to take use all your creativity to take charge of a problem?

I hope so. :)